A COLD, WINTRY WEEKEND

10th and 11th July

We are certainly in the middle of a miserable winter here in Canberra, we have only seen a hint of sunlight over the past forty eight hours, it has definitely been indoor weather.

Jarrett is fully recovered from his injury and yesterday morning we were off to the AIS for hill training. I had been hoping to go for a walk but it was just too freezing to even attempt to leave the car, even with all my winter woollies on.

The rest of our day was a quiet one spent at home playing Upwords, drawing pictures with Nalani and Jarrett, playing Buzz Pop Quiz which by the way I won - just and making some extraordinarily delicious pancakes with Mum and Nalani. Family days spent together are wonderful and when laughter fills the air it makes you realise how lucky we are to have each other. Because it was so cold outside, Dad planted my pansies in the pots for me and it looks like a cascading rainbow, I can now hardly wait for the rest of my garden to transpire.

I have not been without pain this weekend it has continued to rip through my body like a hurricane through a town. My whole right side feels so weakened by it and it is now starting to affect the lower half of my left hand side. I am still unable to stand without falling and attempting to walk has become virtually impossible. I think there is a saying that says you have to learn to stand on your own two feet before you can walk, well this applies to me at the present time. I have also had some more headaches which are causing dizziness and require me to lie down to experience some relief and again I have been unfortunate enough to experience the same total loss of hearing again which lasted for approximately twenty minutes this time.

Last night I slept and woke, slept and woke once again with pain and nausea. The strangest thing happened though and that was one of our cats, Cosima was up on my pillow and she was licking my head. She has done this before, it was for a period of time prior to being diagnosed with my tumour and she has not done it since however last night she was very persistent. I think perhaps she is concerned about me and this is her way of looking after me and trying to make it all better.

The wind was howling and whistling along the side of the house and I could hear rain hitting the window pane, it sounded extremely bitter however the outside temperature was actually quite mild. We had running training again today, this time a long run of fifty minutes along the trails around the AIS area. Even though the temperature was well above average the wind was too arctic to go for a walk and the rain had eased but changed into what appeared to be sleet falling softly from the grey morning sky. I started on a Sudoku puzzle but nodded off to sleep while we waited for Jarrett and the squad to return from their run. At least I was able to gain a half hour extra sleep, I think I am able to get about five hours sleep if I am lucky on any one night and that is on a good night, many other nights I am waking nearly every hour with pain, discomfort and feeling ill.

After running training we came home for a warm drink, they always seem to warm not only your stomach but leave you feeling comfortable and warm all over. We then played Upwords and decided to rug up and venture out to Belconnen to see if we could find any fairy ornaments for my Fairy Garden there, unfortunately we came home empty handed.

Cold, miserable days provide a great opportunity to watch a movie, so we decided to watch a comedy to make us all laugh and break the dismal mood the weather had caused. Billy Madison which is an Adam Sandler Movie is what we chose to watch and we all enjoyed a laugh.

Denis visited and brought boxes of athletic magazines and books for us all to look through, with wet weather predicted for next week I think we will be well occupied with these. It was such a generous thing for Denis to do.

My fingers are tingling as I am typing this so I think I should take a break. Tomorrow I have an appointment with my Paediatrician, he will be able to write the letter for me to get my hearing aid that my oncologist did not do. I will also be able to ask him a few questions about some of the effects I have been experiencing and hopefully he can shed some light on them.

'Sometimes we are dealt a difficult hand in life but no matter what happens we have to stand tall and move forward because life goes on'